Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
There's a mirror laying face down next to me. A looooong full body mirror. By the looks of it it fell off the wall last night and was within centimeters of shattering on my head. Awesome.
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
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