I accidentally had phone sex last night
does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
i just woke up reverse cowgirl on my couch. fully clothed. my laptop is on the floor sideways. blasting gay porn and lady gaga. pizza crust everywhere. goodmorning.
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
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