we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just handed the barista at Starbucks a panty liner instead of my card....maybe I should upgrade this Tall to a Venti...
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
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