Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
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