every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
I'm off the liquor
You're forefathers are ashamed of you. They didn't struggle to make it to America so that you could become a soft dick
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
Neighbor who got arrested at 3am just said he'd split the $ with me if I testify as the witness in his police brutality trial. He was also holding a baby and a case of beer.
Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
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