Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me.
Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life.
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
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