We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
you know you were way too high when you wake up next to a handwritten list of all the things you'd do for a Klondike bar
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
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