Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
Never drink rum straight from the bottle, even if people say it'll make you a pirate. It won't: it'll make you a bumbling shitfaced idiot who just drank rum straight from the bottle.
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
My breasts were aching with rage.
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
My bed smells like the plague
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
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