i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
I haven't been this unsober in a long time. I feel like I am observing myself. Like I am a test subject for alcohol. I wish my brain would shut up and let me be a normal drunk.
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize
