Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
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