I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
I'm sorry for the texts and anything that I said that may have caused confusion, pain or irritation. I shall not be drinking again. Furthermore I will not be keeping a phone on me should I fail to adhere to the prior statement.
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
My bathroom smells like artichokes and absinthe. I am naming a perfume after you and using the money to buy new towels.
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
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