I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
If I die tonight somebody's going to have to let all my tinder matches know.
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
Randomize