Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
Blind date just said "Can't wait till I'm married so i can let myself go". There will be no second date.
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
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