...so i touched it.
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
I just forgot I was standing up.
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
Randomize