Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
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