is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
I just slapped my cat in the face with my dildo. You were the only one I could tell.
He probs deserved it.
Every good man does.
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
Was that you calling me at 4am asking to borrow a rubber ducky and a tampon?
Randomize
