so on my way home this naked dude runs right in front me his weiner at half mast screaming i'm only doing this cause its a 50 dollar dare
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
Wait. Did you let me snort wine last night cause I wanted to smell jesus's blood?
Yes. I have pictures. Your soul is mine.
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
You know what would have been funny if we got arrested last night? The inventory search of the lock box:\n\nContents:\n1 work ID\n1 33 round Glock magazine\n1 set of keys\n1 vibrator\n2 bags fruit snacks\n1 parking hang tag
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Randomize
