Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
I hate college football. It's really fucking with our phone sex schedule.
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
Randomize
