I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
you never keep up with shots anymore
I'm trying to be more responsible these days
you fucking tried to take your pants off and pee in Taco Bell's parking lot
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
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