Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
I got drunken sympathy for the whales' plight last night and signed up to give $50 monthly to Greenpeace. Calling to cancel was worse than the hangover.
Hear that? That's the wail of a dying whale. Murderer.
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
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