he wants to bone in the snuggie
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
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Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
The 3 year old I'm babysitting is the first guy to tell me he loves me sober in like 2 years
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I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
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