Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
All I remember thinking is, why the fuck are there martians on the ceiling? And they were riding fruit. Like strawberries and shit.
Randomize
