you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
You yelled "NICE PAJAMAS" at a construction worker wearing a reflective jumpsuit while we rode past on a bike taxi
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
