i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
Thanks for gettin' me home, killa. Have no IDEA how I woke up pants-less on the bathroom floor at 4a.m. You're like a big, angry guardian angel.
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
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