After I tried for five minutes to hang my beer from the coat hanger in the bathroom , I have realized I am drunk
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
You brought us all personal gifts you had stolen from the party and bellowed "hoes hoes hoes, clepto Santa loves you"
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
They have beer where we have blood.
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
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