its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
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