Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
way to not show up for Habitat for Humanity, real classy...
I saved lives by not driving this morning
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
The cops high fived after they tackled you
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
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