Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
so what if he's got a new girlfriend. the guy i'm fucking has an english accent. i win.
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
He stood me up and then his cat died. I feel like this is Gods way of saying he's on my side, even after the tequila fiasco.
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Randomize
