So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
I use my feet as sexual weapons
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