Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
this just has baby written all over it
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
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