Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
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