About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
Goddamn right, I may not survive the apocalypse, but my eyebrows fucking will.
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
Randomize
