I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
