what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
I was sleeping pretty good until your cat pooped loudly. I dreamed that a full grown man was pooping on my ear. It startled me.
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
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