Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
Randomize
