you only like me because i go down faster than a bridge in minnesota
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
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