Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
Never let your siblings swipe right.
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
Randomize
