New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
so what if he's got a new girlfriend. the guy i'm fucking has an english accent. i win.
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
Randomize
