i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
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i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Made eye contact with a friendly neighborhood dog walker while violently puking out the window. How's your Wednesday going?
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
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