We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
Randomize