Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
Hi Jason, it's Liz. We dont need you to pick us up anymore. I dont care if you will be here in a milisecond. And you should know im wearing really amazing shoes.
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
I am officially out of liquor stores within a 15 mile radius that don't recognize me as soon as I walk in the door.
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
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