Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
Dude. My tinder just blew up in Seattle. I'm moving here. I don't give a fuck
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
Randomize
