hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
Randomize
