porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
Randomize
