SEEEEXXX PLEASE
the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
I forgot to tell you, that tinder guy literally lives 15 floors beneath me. I have been creepily saying things to him like "I see youve got a hammer on the patio"
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
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