isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
We are the drunkest people in Toys R' Us right now
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
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