If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
1) Woke up alone with my bathing suit on inside out spooning an empty bottle of Jack, 2) get the fuck on to my level 3) please pick me up and bring a stuffed pony, some Oreo's and my pride...
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
Dude come over...were drunk and I'm holding a T-shirt gun and discovered beer cans are the same size as rolled shirts.
Randomize