More tranny stories later!
It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
Randomize
