Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
Randomize
