dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
We're in ER. He's high on morphine and I'm drunk. Gonna score some bed pans for jello shots.
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
Randomize
