wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
hell yes lets make some ravioli
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
Randomize
